Audio By Carbonatix
A vanity license plate reading STAYCLN hints at several possible interpretations. A desire to keep the vehicle nice and shiny, perhaps, or maybe a suggestion to others to watch their language. But if Kenneth Cline also saw it as a sign to stay sober, he may have to reconsider following a crash-and-bash session on New Year’s Eve.
The story comes to us from our friends at the Boulder Daily Camera. According to a police report cited by the paper, Cline was seen trying to buy booze at an area Liquor Mart on December 31.
Unusual? Hardly, especially considering the date — and it was only 9 p.m. But the store reportedly turned down Cline’s purchase, because he was already three sheets to the wind.
After this rejection, Cline is said to have hopped into a Chevy Silverado sporting that STAYCLN tag and taken off. Once underway, a witness said he let no portion of the immediate environment go to waste, weaving across multiple lanes, medians and sidewalks, and allegedly smacking into two cars.
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Boulder Police officers caught up with Cline near the intersection of Folsom and Valmont and asked him to take a sobriety test. His response: “I can’t pass them.”
He should know: The Camera reports that he’d been arrested at least twice before for driving under the influence.
STAYCLN, dude. Here’s a larger look at Cline’s mug shot.
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More from our Shmuck of the Week archive: “Drunken speeding is no reason to be fired, says ex-cop Derrick Saunders.”
