Technology is a wonderful thing, as you guys who have seen TV’s greatest commercial or whose girlfriends get the Victoria’s Secret catalogue already know. The new Body by Victoria IPEX brassiere is touted as “the world’s most advanced bra” — and by “advanced,” they mean “making the average-looking bosom seem…
The attractive man directly across the bar was wearing a black T-shirt with cut-off sleeves and the word “Fruitcake.” When I suggested to my companion that not only was the shirt redundant, but would be far more creative with an inventive slogan like “Rum Balls” or perhaps “Cherries Jubilee,” he…
I have a new bar to add to my list of favorites, and I owe it all to my favorite Scotswoman, Julie Docherty. It’s somewhat surprising that I remember her or the Streets of London Pub (1501 East Colfax Avenue) at all, because several members of the Institute of Drinking…
Love often blossoms in the spring, and suddenly there’s a lot to love in Cherry Creek, where everyone’s heading North. This new restaurant was brought to us by Sam Fox, who owns a number of spots around the country, including Bloom in FlatIron Crossing. Although North’s decor is streamlined, the…
As a member of a very Irish and Catholic family, I look forward to St. Patrick’s Day as much as I do Christmas. Since I first convinced someone to buy me beer, I’ve tied one on every March 17. In the beginning, I thought that drinking green beer was a…
I was entertaining a friend who’d surprised me by popping into town, and I wanted to take him to a cool “Denver” spot for drinks. After considering some of the trendier options, I went with one of our historical gems: the Cruise Room. Anyone who’s lived in this city for…
Sometimes things happen that you just can’t explain. American Idol is a success, and William Hung and other contestants have never taken Simon out back so they can fill all of his bodily orifices with concrete. Latrell Sprewell hasn’t gotten a massive federal grant to feed his family. And men…
I love a great dive, and at fifty-plus years young, Club 404 is one of the all-time best dives in Denver. Jerry Feld bought the bar on his twentieth birthday and has been there ever since (although his uncle had to run it for the first year, until Jerry was…
Although every person from sun-intensive states like Texas or Florida thinks he not only knows how to drive in the snow, but knows how to ski without putting the rest of the people on the mountain at risk of life and limb, we all can use an occasional winter-survival refresher…
When I walked up to the bar at El Tejado, I asked the bartender for Patrón on the rocks. “Are you sure?” he asked. “Don Julio is better.” Although I’ve been drinking Patrón for years, I decided to go with Don Julio Anejo ($7.50) and was happy that I did…
As all good Catholics know — as do those who are not good, but are well-versed in church law after spending several years finding loopholes in it — there is still plenty of time to give up something for Lent. For people who are neither good nor bad Catholics, Lent…
I rarely look forward to going to the ‘burbs, but this weekend I’m getting the hell out of downtown and Cherry Creek. I know that some people are really excited about the All-Star Game and all the hoopla (read: hype) surrounding it, but I’m not a basketball enthusiast, and to…
Sorry, ladies, but we guys can’t help how we are. We can’t help it that the outfit we wore on that first date doesn’t hold a prominent place in our brains. We have an inexplicable ability to watch four sporting events at one time, yet still cannot remember your birthday…
The Campus Lounge, affectionately referred to by regulars as “The Pus,” oozes character. Years ago, when I lived only a few blocks away, the gaggle of guys who occupied the house next door would yell over the fence almost nightly, “Levine, ya wanna go to the Pus?” On one such…
Do you believe in miracles? The continued marketing of Zima and of Aspen low-carb “beer” certainly qualify. So does having a clear conscience after excusing four nights of drinking on the pretext that “I haven’t seen so-and-so for a long time.” That the suspiciously close relationship of SpongeBob SquarePants and…
As I walked up to the bar at the Stockyard Inn, I heard a guy ask the bartender, “Do you have anything on special?” She smiled, put her tattooed arms on her hips, pushed out her chest and replied, “You’re lookin’ at it, sugar.” It was a scene straight out…
Patrick Lawler should be awarded the Nobel Prize for medicine. For those of you who live in a cellar or are purists who won’t watch anything on a TV smaller than 42 inches, Mr. Lawler is the gentleman who proved to the world that hangovers are caused by huge nails…
The sign above the Thin Man’s bar warned: “Drunkenness prohibited.” That appealed to the rule-breaker in me, so…game on! I ordered the first thing I saw on the blackboard, the Crystal Snooker ($5.50), made with homemade cinnamon vodka and half sour mix, half ginger ale. This cocktail had definite potential…
There’s no doubt in my mind that God created beer. How else can you explain many of the world’s greatest accomplishments? Without beer, we wouldn’t have professional sports, much less overlapping schedules that allow us to watch the World Series and college football on the same day. Without beer, there…
My friend Matt was bragging about what a fabulous bowler he is, crediting his Polish heritage for his prowess. Yeah, bowling was fine, I told him, but what about a more practical ethnic legacy, like a thorough knowledge of Polish vodka? Rising to the challenge, Matt insisted we go to…
Every once in a while you find yourself sitting on your couch at nine at night with a couple of guys, and you realize that you’re all too drunk to do much besides sit on a couch — but you can’t stay there any longer because the football game’s over…
Tyler Wiard, executive chef at Mel’s, learned of the fire at the salon next door when one of the line cooks called on the morning of December 20 and said, “Uh, I don’t think we’re working today.” When Wiard was finally able to get into the restaurant days later, it…
