Look, Melo, you don’t know me, and I don’t know you. That’s obvious. You made that painfully clear at the last Nuggets game I attended when, despite the fact that I shrieked “Melo, Melo, Melo!” for the better part of three quarters, you didn’t so much as acknowledge my presence…
Colorado Springs-based Focus on the Family has long been a media magnet, for obvious reasons: Any organization willing to take on an enemy as wily as SpongeBob Squarepants is bound to receive attention. But lately, another Christian institution in the area — New Life Church — has joined Focus in…
Here’s a brainteaser for you and your mountain-biking buds to ponder over a bottle of Fat Tire after your latest single-track adventure: Is a mountain bike a machine? It’s not exactly the riddle of the Sphinx. But like many seemingly inane sports ponderables (how, exactly, did Carmelo get into bars…
A Little Behind in His Work No kidding: My favorite part of “Spanks for the Memories,” Jared Jacang Maher’s May 19 cover story, was when Michael “Masterson” said, “My kids do not even know what spanking is. Spanking sucks as a way to raise your child.” I’m sure that when…
“I’m a fetishist,” announces Christiaan Howard. “I love women’s feet.” As creative director and CEO of Afterdarkkmedia, the 34-year-old Howard is the force behind Erotik-a, an annual fetish-themed gala designed to “to try to get people of all shapes and sizes to express themselves sensually without fucking each other.” The…
The action began in the walled courtyard of the James Beard House, a bastion of good taste and stuff that tastes good in the tony West Village. Young waiters darted among black-clad diners who sucked down tray after tray of hors d’oeuvre like a school of barracuda — hors d’oeuvre…
On May 10, representatives of Infinity Radio, a New York-based company that owns Denver stations KOOL 105, Jammin’ 92.5 and KIMN, handed market manager Drew Hilles his head. At this point, the motivations behind the firing are unclear; neither Hilles nor Infinity vice president/programming Keith Abrams could be reached for…
Online troublemaker Mike Zinna, whose JeffcoExposed.com website recently claimed Jefferson County Commissioner Rick Sheehan’s scalp, is a bona fide member of the mainstream media, with a new KHOW radio show, Colorado Exposed, set to debut at 7 p.m. Saturday, May 28. Yet this status hasn’t opened doors for Zinna in…
It’s getting so a whore can’t even apply ointment to her festering lesions on Colfax these days without bumping into some yuppie on his way for a margarita. Used to be a time when the only businesses you could find on the ‘Fax were pawnshops and methadone clinics, markets that…
Channel 7 once loomed over the area’s television landscape like a colossus, but that was before a lot of people reading this newspaper were born. The station’s 22-year reign as Denver’s preeminent outlet ended around the time Gerald Ford lost the presidency, and since then, a parade of general managers…
A Walk on the Wilding Side The never-ending story: I was really impressed by Patricia Calhoun’s “A Piece of the Action,” in the May 12 issue. I can’t believe what happened to Quincy Shannon, and I hope he is acquitted of all charges. Unless being a young black man automatically…
No matter how much helium Lawrence Phipps pumped into his inflatable sheep, he could not get the damn thing to levitate. It was 1997. Phipps was making his first voyage to the Burning Man Festival, and he had absolutely no idea what he was doing. He’d flown from Denver to…
Suppose you’re the warden of a women’s prison. Among your valued employees is a correctional officer named Dave, whose job puts him in charge of dozens of female inmates for long, lonely nights. Dave is a popular guy among his colleagues. But there’s also something odd about him. One day…
Not since the days of Pat Schroeder, who coined the term “Teflon President” to describe Ronald Reagan, has Colorado had a congressperson as quotable as Tom Tancredo. Although the longtime Denver Democrat is on the opposite end of the political spectrum from the four-term (and counting) Republican representative, they share…
God, it seemed like 2:30 p.m. would never come Monday at the State Capitol. While Senate president Joan Fitz-Gerald blah, blah, blahed and Speaker of the House Andrew Romanoff droned on and on about only, like, the most boring stuff ever in the history of the whole entire universe, senators…
When it comes to Denver radio, English remains the tongue of choice, but Spanish is getting in its licks. The latest Arbitrons placed two Spanish-language stations — KXPK-FM/96.5 and KBNO-AM/1280 — among the ten most popular outlets as judged by Denverites twelve and older. KFMD, previously known as KISS-FM, landed…
Even staring-mad, orange-to-the-bone Broncos fans were snoozing through the third round of last month’s NFL draft when Mike Shanahan exploded a major bomb under their butts. Maurice Clarett! You gotta be kidding! Only a lunatic on crack would take a chance on the whiny, divisive ex-Ohio State running back. Talk…
The Joke’s on Us Party hearty: After seeing Kenny Be’s “Crusadertainment for Men,” his Worst-Case Scenario in the April 28 issue, I have a Prayboy Party Joke: Q: What is the best way to unmask the religious intolerance of the “liberal” media? A: Take a public stand on a moral…
A wide red line runs across the floor of the visiting room like a clown’s grin, separating the guard post and the civilian exit from the rest of the place. Prisoners are forbidden to cross that line. Joseph Principe stays way, way clear of the line. The last thing he…
It’s thirty degrees and dropping at seven o’clock, and the thick gray clouds that cap the sky in all directions look about ready to dump. Rita Anderson knows this could be bad news for the monkeys. “We have to remember that when we’re out here suffering a little bit in…
May 9 is D-day for me and my dog Madeline, whom I rescued from the streets on New Year’s Day 2004. For the last year, we’ve lived in peace — which means not having to look over our shoulders every time a Denver Animal Control officer drives by. But that…
Is billionaire Phil Anschutz crying poverty? That’s the subtext of an e-mail sent to youth soccer organizations about The Game of Their Lives, an Anschutz Film Group movie that tells the true (or close enough) story of an American team that upset an English squad in the 1950 World Cup…
